I always said that if my children still lived at home when they turned 25, their birthday gift would be first and last month's rent to their own apartment. I never had to follow through on that because both of them were off to see the world and blaze their own paths in life by the time they were 18 and 19!
Blast teaching them to be independent! I have to laugh at the irony of the situation as it's still a struggle to adjust to the fact that I don't get to see them (almost) every day any more. Even when they were away just for the weekend I had to close their bedroom doors because my heart would miss them even during those short times. And yet now MONTHS go by before I can see them, hug them, breathe in their presence and look into their beautiful faces.
Sure, we are in pretty much constant communication thanks to the modern world and things like Snap Chat, Facebook Messenger, Instagram and FaceTime, but it's not quite the same.
As I sit in the airport awaiting my flight back to Alberta I am filled with a deep sense of love, pride and appreciation for the strong relationships that we have together. The memories that we made as they transitioned from fully dependent children to fully independent adults fill me with a bittersweet longing to visit those times on occasion. To be able to hold them and watch their innocent faces as they sleep secure in my arms.
Despite the fact that my younger self was aware enough to recognize how quickly time flies and I really tried to focus on being in the moment with them, life's demands as a single working mom often undermined that effort. There were times that my children felt that I put work before them and that cut me to the core. All my hard work and efforts were and will always be to provide them with the best life that I can.
At this stage of life, the demands of parenting are far less on a day to day basis, but none of us can ever deny that we will ALWAYS need our moms. My mom is the first person I call when anything happens in my life - good or not so good.
Enter grandchildren. Oh how the universe brings us what we need! Holding my sweet little grandson in my arms and watching his growth in one short year of life brings me right back to those moments that I experienced with my babies! Holding him and watching him as he sleeps brings back all of those wonderful feelings of love and joy at witnessing the beauty of life!
Chasing him as he crawls through the house trying to get at things he cannot have and hearing him giggle with glee when he knows we're coming to get him reminds me why we have our children at a young age! LOL This grandma may not be old, but she's definitely not 24 any more!!
It warms my heart to watch my daughter and her spouse lovingly care for him together. They are wonderful parents and it makes my heart swell with love and pride!
Though I can't help but shed tears of joy when I arrive and sob through the drive to the airport when I leave, I know that I am abundantly blessed with love of family - including parents, siblings and a very large, amazing extended family - and I can feel good that my children have launched successfully into their own lives.
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